The journey continues....this morning Brett (my husband) calls me, "I'm on my way home...", "what, why?"...."They let me go". Hmmm, really? O.K., this is going to make our testimony even AWESOMER!!! (is that a word?) Honestly...it didn't phase me that much at this point, sorta had to laugh. Like Lord, you are sooooo in control, I love you and I can't wait to see where you're going to take us next. He promises to always be with us! His word is true and His love endures forever.
"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8
Then about 1/2 hour later I get a call from my Oncologist. She tells me just got out of a meeting discussing my case with 10 other Oncologists at the center (Moffit). They agree on everything except the recent results of my PET Scan. One of my lymph nodes "lit" up...when something "lights" up on this particular test it indicates cancer. This lymph node could be cancerous or it could be still reacting to my surgery, the doctors were divided about it. Either way they need to know because it will alter my treatment plan. "How could this alter my treatment plan?", "Well if it is cancer then we will have to do 6 rounds of chemo instead of the planned 4." Oh Lord, please let it be not cancer!
I told my doctor my sister was flying in today as she wants to be with me for my 1st treatment..."how soon can you get me in for the biopsy?" "I'll see what I can do." Within a 1/2 hour they had called me to schedule my biopsy on Monday. So hopefully my scheduled 1st treatment will happen without delay.
I went shopping a couple of days of go to look at wigs...they look "wiggy", fake, not me at all. I was pretty discouraged about this, not to mention how expensive they are! A good friend of mine told me about a place in Tampa that has great wigs made out of human hair....expensive, but they look very good. Not sure when I'll be able to go, but I'd sure like to try one on. Do you believe insurance doesn't cover wigs for people going through chemo? It's considered a luxury item....whatever. I don't mind wearing scarf's and plan to most of the time, but I think there is going to be those times when I want to go out in public and not want everyone to know what I'm going through and I'd love to have a wig that I'm comfortable with for those days.
On a VERY positive note...I had my very 1st Jewelry show last night. I have started my own jewelry business through a Christian company called "Premier Designs". I have wanted to do this for a few months now, but when I got my diagnosis I thought..."now's not the time, plate full." Well the Lord kept placing it on my heart and I could not stop thinking about it. I felt like the Lord told me this would be something positive for me to do while I'm going through my treatment; as well as a way I can help my family financially during this time. God was right, shock, surprise...he he. Of course He is....my show was so fun and very successful! I was so touched by the ladies who were able to come and support me in this new venture!!!! I'm even having another "show" tomorrow. This truly has helped me focus on something else besides all the yucky and scary stuff coming up. I love doing this, it was the right decision. Especially now that Brett is out of work, I'm the sole income earner! :)
I'll tell ya, if somebody would have told me in January what our year would be like I would have never believed it!!!! But as a result, my faith has sky rocketed and my love for Jesus is OUT OF CONTROL!!!! I sure hope it's contagious! Being able to see His hand working in big stuff and in the little bitty small stuff is something I would never have wanted to miss out on. The more difficult the situation the more we are refined, the more we will look like Christ. What joy awaits us on the other end, I can hardly wait!!!!
"Those who sow with tears will reap with songs of joy." Psalm 126:5
I love it.
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